My kids make me laugh

• Kaylee is 6. She is starting to figure out what we as parents have been able to get away with for years......bribery! We started giving her allowance for vacuuming 3 times a week. She must vacuum the upstairs once, the downstairs once, and the entire house once per week in order to earn her $2. Last week, she did soo good. I was so proud of her. We didn't even have to ask her, she just did it, and she was excited about doing it too! Well, Friday, she went and disappeared to her room for almost an hour. She came downstairs and told me that she had cleaned her room....ALL.BY.HERSELF. I took a peek and WOW!!!! She not only cleaned it, but she made her bed, and organized, and dusted, and everything.

Saturday, it was allowance time. But, she still had to do the whole house vacuum on that day. Well, the play room was covered in train tracks and trains, which obviously were not hers. But, she picked up 3/4 of them before starting the vacuum, to which at that point, Brayden started picking them up in a hurry because he knows the rule...

IF YOU LEAVE TOYS OUT AND WE VACUUM, THEY GET VACUUMED UP!

By the way, I will continue with that rule until he figures out that they really won't fit in the vacuum cleaner and we are just using bribery....again. She's already figured it out. It was like a light bulb went off in her head. "Mom" she whispered in my ear..."those don't fit up the hose, you're just playing with him right?"

So, after she completes her chores that day, I asked Chris how much we should give her since she did extra work that week, and she was VERY well behaved and was very helpful to me. We decided on $3.

Before he gave it to her, he asked her if she'd like to earn a little more by helping Brayden clean his bedroom, which was also covered in train tracks and trains. She responds "Nah, I'm good with $3" and took the money and ran.......

• Brayden pushed Grayson down the other day, deliberately. I saw it happen, so I went over to him, sat him down, squeezed his cheeks and made him look me directly in the eyes.

Me:"Brayden, why did you push him down? He wasn't doing anything to you?"

Brayden: "Mom, he was heading right betowards me!"

It's nearly impossible to punish a child when you are laughing.....betowards??? I love it when little kids make up big words to sound smart.

• Chris picked up the kids from my moms house the other day and brought them home and we planned on going out to run errands and have dinner. Kaylee, who was overtired and exhausted and emotional, came in the house crying hysterically. She runs up to me and says "Mom....you and me HAVE to go upstairs". I look at Chris, who is walking in behind her and he gives me this eye roll as if to say "she's over reacting, or she's emotional over nothing" and I'm thinking to myself "what happened to my little girl that we have to go upstairs, just the 2 of us to take care of? Did she get her period already?"

I asked her what was wrong and through sobs and tears she pulls her hair back behind her ear and dramatically says "Mom, I can't go in public with only ONE earring in!"

Apparently, her earring had fallen out when she dozed off in Chris' truck and she was VERY upset about losing her earring......

Anniversary Oops

So some of you may know that Chris and I got our wedding date tattoo'ed on us years ago. Neither one of us wanted to do name tattoos, so we decided to do the date that we were joined as one. Mine is on my back shoulder, and his is on his arm. (mine below)

I'm actually pretty wise to suggest this because then, he has no reason to ever forget our anniversary....right?

So we went out Saturday night to celebrate our anniversary with a romantic dinner. I asked him before we left if we were going to exchange cards that night, or wait until Tuesday (our actual anniversary). He responds "uuum, how about ON our anniversary....WEDNESDAY!"

Yikes! How did I not know when it was? Well, in my defense, I knew what DAY it was, the 26th....I just didn't know when the 26th was this year... I've been extremely busy and my calendar is no longer a calendar day timer. It's a list of dates on my iPhone. So, I rarely know what day of the week it is when I wake up, nor do I know the actual date. I thought our anniversary was the day after the kids went back to school, which I thought was Monday, which would make our anniversary on Tuesday.....well....they go back Tuesday, which makes our anniversary on Wednesday. Gosh, he got me there.

Fast forward to Sunday night..... we go to "meet the pastor", a new member fellowship at our pastor's house. We are all taking turns "telling about our family" and sharing who we are, all about our kids, etc.... So, since my husband is the quiet, shy and observing type, he lets me do all the talking.....naturally.

I start "We are Chris and Tiffany.....we've been married 9 yrs this coming Tuesday......"

He says "ahem...Wednesday"

Of course, uproars of laughter fill the room, hi-fives are taking place between the men and Chris, and he then proceeds to show everyone his tattoo and why he doesn't forget our anniversary.....

Yeah, he showed me up......and I giggled.....not just once, but TWICE I have done that in a matter of days.

So, later on in bed we were chatting and I told him "don't be surprised if I tell you Happy Anniversary on Tuesday again, since I can't seem to remember what day of the week it is on"

He replies (as Chris would do in this situation......) "it's OK, you just totally set me up for looking like the BEST husband ever....."

And he really is......which is why I love him.

One Year Later.....

Grayson's surgery was one year ago today. One year ago, I was bawling at the thought of him having surgery.....oh wait, I still do. Well, I may not bawl my eyes out like a complete baby, but I sure do tear up every time I think about it, see pictures about it, and talk to anyone about it. I think it was more traumatic on me than it was on him. He is such a strong little man. From birth, he has been a fighter, and he's been a tough little cookie. He has not changed. He's only become stronger and more of a fighter. Watch out Kaylee and Brayden....here comes little bruiser! He walks like a bruiser, talks...more like grunts....like a bruiser, and acts like a bruiser.

We thought of a nickname for months that would describe him. Sweet Pea, G-man, Sweetie pie, and Kaylee even wanted to call him Bubba 2. I veto'ed that right away seeing as how I never even wanted a "bubba", much less a "sissy"...and I have BOTH thanks to her. Those are such redneck nicknames, and remind me of "Urban Cowboy" and she ended up making those the nicknames for her and Brayden.....and they were set in stone before I could get my veto power out there!

Anyways, I promise this is going somewhere. So, we were trying to find something that fit him and we came up with "lil bruiser" from the day he started walking. If you've ever seen the show Chelsea Lately, her little person sidekick Chuey.....Yeah, Grayson walks JUST like him. His belly sticks out, his feet turn in just a tad, and he walks around like he needs a sumo diaper thingy. Well, if I were to let him walk around in his diaper, he WOULD look just like a sumo wrestler....or Chuey in a diaper, maybe.

So, back to the one year update.....

I was all sorts of sad for 8 or 9 weeks. I got in a funk around June. (That's why I didn't really blog much) I know there are some moms who can relate to this... when we celebrate our children's FIRST birthday, we tend to do a whole list of "at this time last year I was....." and fill in the blanks with...Huge and disgustingly fat and pregnant, eating my last meal, trying to find something to wear that didn't totally make me look like a walking tent, trying to keep clean shaven in an area that you haven't seen in months.... just in case today is "the day", loosing the mucus plug, feeling the first contraction...etc.

Well, in my case, I had this...
June 20th around 6am: "One year ago today, I was in labor and didn't even know it until my husband pointed out to me that while I was sitting on the toilet, thinking I had to poop and wondering what all the blood was for, I winced every 3 minutes and stopped talking to him and he was only there because I had forced him to sit on the bathtub and talk to me while I was trying to 'go'." (and in my defense, even though it was my third kid, it was my first "go into labor" experience I've ever had....and I didn't know you bled when you went into labor)

June 20th around 2pm: "One year ago today, I was ready to push him out, but I was only dilated to a 9, and had been there since noon and got stuck and his heart rate started to drop"

June 20th around 2:45: "One year ago today, I was being wheeled into the OR ready to have my belly sliced open in a mere 5 minutes flat in order to save my son, who's heart rate would not stay up, and was thanking God that I already had my epidural in so that all they had to do was inject some stronger stuff and not have to totally run a new one"

June 20th around 6pm: "One year ago today, I was holding my precious baby boy, and admiring how beautiful he was and even though I was in lots of pain, and had a constant burning sensation from my incision, I was so happy that he arrived safe and sound and he was one big 8 lb ball of oeey gooey squishiness"

June 21st around noon: "One year ago today, I was in my hospital room with my dad, who was keeping me company while Chris took the kids to a birthday party, when the pediatric Doctor came in and told me he had Craniosynostosis" to which I replied "huh?" and after getting a short synopsis of what exactly that meant, I still was in denial and said "no, he was trying to come out with the back of his head first, that's why his head is cone head on the back and not on top, and that's why he wouldn't come out" to which she responded with "I hope you are right, but I want you to get him checked out just in case" and inside she was thinking "you poor, poor woman who's just delivered a precious baby boy and is in denial of his medical condition and I KNOW I'm right....but, she IS drugged up on vicodin for her burning radiating pain from her incision so maybe I should cut her some slack and be a little gentle with the news" OK, maybe she wasn't thinking that, but she could have been. That's how I felt.

June 22nd around noon: "One year ago today, again, while my husband is out of the room getting lunch and I am left alone in my room, the second pediatric Dr came in and confirmed that he also was sure Grayson had craniosynostosis and URGED me to go have it checked out, but left shortly after and told me to call him if I had any questions (probably because he couldn't take all the tears that were streaming out of my eyes and down my face so quickly it actually resembled a running faucet)" Why is there a pattern of them coming in when Chris is not in here? Now I have to relay all this information that I only hear through ears that are water logged from tears running down my face with no where else to go, so they twist and turn and go straight into my ears because they came out too fast to run straight down my cheeks.

I could go on and on but I know I am rambling. I decided that instead of typing this post all prim and proper to make my english teacher (who's name I can't even remember) proud, and then realizing that she will most likely NEVER read this because if I can't remember her name, why would she remember mine, so who really cares if I am typing one big long huge run on sentence without proper punctuation.?,!:; I am typing how I talk and I hope you can follow along and get a few giggles along the way. It is after all, a potentially sad post that I would normally be crying over while trying to type through tear filled eyes, while trying to concentrate on whether or not I just put a period instead of a comma, and I can't focus on the screen because it's all blurry, and it's keeping my mind off of "the real reason" for this post and it's actually working to keep the tears at bay. Whew! Probably could have done without this whole entire paragraph, but oh well..I will keep it.

So, fast forward to August 8.

"One year ago today, I was handing my 11 lb baby over to the neurosurgeon to have his skull cut open and have pieces of bone removed in an attempt to correct his 3 fused sutures and have a normal shaped head, and not put pressure on his brain"

"One year ago, I saw my son in recovery and cried buckets of tears over his bed, and probably all over him too, because of his little innocent scratchy throat cry from the breathing tube being in his throat for 3 hours and he was crying because he was in so much pain, and he was so pale white because of the blood lost in the surgery and his blood transfusion takes time to turn his cheeks back to their normal shade of pink and I couldn't do anything about his pain because I couldn't hold him and I couldn't make his pain go away and he was so confused and kept looking at me like mommy, why aren't you holding me and I'm all like, wait, I need a new bucket, this one is all filled up with my tears"

Dammit....there's those tears that I was fighting back during this post and Chris went and got me some kleenex...Man, I was doing sooo good.

"One year ago today, I was broken hearted. Sad that my precious baby boy had to have this procedure done. Confused as to why it happened. Scared to touch him for fear of hurting him. But, I had to toughen up and take care of him and tend to his every need and get him back in his normal surroundings as quickly as possible so that he could heal."

One month ago today, I found this verse: “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” Psalm 147:3

Umm, hello? Isn't this like two birds with one stone? I was broken hearted FOR my son and he was wounded. He healed my brokenheartedness and he bound up Grayson's wound and he healed so perfectly. So, I honestly feel like this verse was written FOR ME, FOR US, even though it was written forever and a day ago....

Grayson is still one big HUGE ball of oeey gooey squishiness, only it's a VERY VERY freakin heavy ball. Like, probably 27 or 28 lbs, and he stole my heart, and he's a momma's boy and I let him get away with too much stuff because he is my baby and I protect him, and he knows that he can give me his pouty face and go "wa" and he doesn't even finish that word and I am giving into whatever he wants. He also knows that if he has something that he is not supposed to have, he can look at us, shoot us a sly mischevious grin and hide said item behind his back and when we go reach for it he can turn and twist his body around so that we can't reach it and then he squeals like a banshee and takes off running and we go running after him and he squeals again, looks behind him to make SURE we are chasing him and he runs faster, and we are chasing him around the house and he's really fast so it actually takes half the length of the "track" that goes around our bottom floor to actually catch up to him. Then he squeals again, only this time, it's not an excited "mommy is chasing me and this is fun" squeal...it's a loud high pitched birdlike squeal that says "dammit woman, don't take away the toy that I found, because it's rightfully mine because I did twist and turn and put my hand even MORE behind my back and you couldn't reach it" And I pick him up and hold him and try to console him and have a normal adult to child conversation as to why he can't have my computer mouse, or my iPhone and run around the house with it and he sticks his hand down my shirt and rests his fingers right smack dab in between my cleavage. And all is suddenly OK!

Yep, I have a booby baby! He can be right smack dab in the middle of Yo Gabba Gabba and totally enthralled with the show when he will suddenly realize that I am sitting next to him on the couch and he does NOT have his hands down my shirt, so he sneaks ever so quickly and quietly with his hand and puts in in the designated spot.....without taking his eyes off the TV the entire time. He is a SUPER SMART baby. He has broken every record so far that Kaylee has set for him as far as learning new things, and he is going to be the "big" little brother....I'm convinced.

Well, I'm tired now and heading to bed, so I hope you enjoy this short quick novel. I'll post 1 yr pictures as soon as I get to upload them off my camera.

Finally- Time to catch up

OK- not really that I have TIME to, but I need to, or I'll never get around to it..just like my scrapbooks. I haven't updated them since 2006 Christmas. Ugh. I know I need to, but I can't figure out where to start. Plus, with the rhinestone shirt business underway, I simply don't have time these days to do anything....really, I am not kidding. I shuffle my kids back and forth from school, to camps, to dance, VBS, to the gym, and then collapse in sheer exhaustion when it's all over. Add Dr appts to boot, and we are one busy, BUSY family.

So, I would normally back date posts to co-incide with the dates that it actually happened, but I have a feeling they would just get lost and not be read. So, instead, I'm just going to write a REALLY, REALLY long post. Sorry. It will have lots of pictures though.

So, Grayson is doing very well. We had his checkups this week and he is 25 lbs (85%). He is 30.5 inches long (75%) and his head is between 19.5"-20" around (he's a wiggle worm and doesn't like his head measured) which makes it off the charts.still.forever. I asked his neurosurgeon about this and if he would ever "grow into" his head. His answer was simple, but understandable. NO. He was born with a large head, coupled with sagittal synostosis, he will always have a large head. 2% of children are above average in head circumference and he falls in that 2%. Most of that 2% is made up of sagittal synostosis patients. OK. So, he really really is taking after me and my big head. I say it's because he has a lot of brains to fill it up.


His nickname is Lil' Bruiser. If you could see him walk, you'd see why. He totally looks like a bruiser or bully. Walking around like a bulldog, and sometimes resembling a sumo wrestler. He walks through the house patting his belly, and stomping one leg (like a sumo wrestler) He has the chunkiest thighs of ALL my babies, and I think he takes the prize for the biggest belly too. (besides mine, of course) Grayson is released from any further treatments, or follow-ups with the neurosurgeon. They say he is also released for any sports that he wishes to play, but I don't know if I'll ever be OK with that.

We had his birthday party this past weekend. It was very fun, but our air conditioner went out on Friday night, which made for a miserable HOT Saturday. But, luckily, the party was outside anyways, so my guests knew they were gonna be hot and dressed appropriately. We themed his party "Grayson's Splish Splash Birthday Bash" and used yellow rubber ducks to decorate with. Invitations, Thank you's, decorations, plates, napkins, etc were all Yellow Ducky. We rented a 16 ft. water slide for the older kids. They LOVED it. There was NEVER a break in the line to go up. It was always full. We had a baby pool for the babies with about 6" of water in it (for safety) and I also filled up our duck pond with water and floated some ducks in it. It was actually our old built in sandbox, but it ran out of sand...go figure, with Brayden and co.... so we dumped out the remainder and used it for our temporary duck pond. The in-between-age kids had fun sitting in it. It had more water in it than the baby pool (probably 1 ft) and they all crammed in it. We dubbed it the "hot tub" for the day. After playing for a while, we enjoyed Lasagna, Pizza, Bread and Salad, we all had some Ducky cake. Then the kids all got Ducky themed gift bags, filled with rubber duckies, ducky necklaces, bubbles, candy, etc... In lieu of gifts, we asked that our guests bring a donation to the Texas Childrens Hospital Neurosurgery floor. We collected almost $200 for them. (which I left on the counter when we went to our appt, so we'll have to plan a trip to the zoo very soon and drop it off then...gggrrr) We wanted to give back to the hospital so that the other neurosurgery patients could have some new stuff to play with while recovering. I also was able to use it as a learning lesson for my older 2 children, that giving to others is the best thing you can do. Not only does it help other people out, but it gives you a warm fuzzy feeling inside. :-)


Finally the AC got fixed at 8pm that night. Whew. That's a story for another day...

Brayden finished his 3 yr old preschool this year. We debated for a while if we were going to start him in Kindergarten when he was 5, or wait until he is 6. His birthday is LATE August and we just don't feel like he is going to be ready next year, so we are holding him back this year. So, next year he will repeat at the same school with the same teacher in the 3 yr old class. He will be with a lot of kids that were in his 2 yr class because their birthdays were after Sept 1, so they got put in the 2yr old class again when he moved up to the 3yr class. So, old friends....new tricks.

He really is ALL BOY! He recently started showing his emotional side and says things to me like "mommy, I still like you" UUMMM, STILL? I laugh because it's his way of saying I love you, but man, that would be offensive if he said that to his girlfriend in 15 yrs. Today, he actually gave me an arm kiss and told me "mommy, I just love you". Big improvement! Thank you, Brayden! He torments Kaylee and Grayson, but then he will turn around and hug them, which would make it all better, but then he may spit at them right afterwards....Man, I just don't know what to do with him. He also says "mommy... I want you" which means he needs some snuggle time, or he will tell us at night that his back hurts, "that's why he needs us to rub his back and give him purple sugar" (tylenol, which he apparently thinks is candy)


Kaylee finished Kindergarten this year and is excited to move on to 1st grade! I still cannot believe I have a 1st grader! She got her first phone call from a friend the other day. Wow, that was not expected. I thought mom's still called on their girls behalf until age 8 or 9...I guess not. She is reading on a 3rd grade level and was... as she says "the 4th smartest kid in her class".

She had been dubbed "Polly-Talks-A-Lot" by us because she does not.stop.talking.from the time her eyes open until she finally gives up and lays still at night. She finally broke the 40 lb mark!! WOO HOO! That was a BIG HUGE acomplishment for her. She's been 39 lbs for, I swear, 2 yrs!

Kaylee and Brayden both took 6 rounds of swim lessons in the winter/spring so this summer, if we are not at home, we are at the pool. Any pool. Wherever we can get an invite to since we don't have a neighborhood pool. Chris really wants a backyard pool, but we are still weighing our options with this economy. (it would definietly be fenced, so don't fret) They both swim very good though, and for my comfort level, Brayden still wears floaties and Kaylee has to stay where she can touch the bottom. I am always with Grayson in his baby float, so I couldn't be worried about where they both were and constantly worrying about if they were floating, swimming, drowning, etc... Brayden has NO fear and is a little fish, but that's the part that worries me. He drinks water, gags, chokes, and has vomited before, so I can't deal with that while trying to keep 2 others kids afloat. But, this is our first summer to really "swim" so we are enjoying every minute of it.

OK- so I think that catches me up, so now for the pictures....

I love this mischevious face Grayson makes....

Brayden's Sweet Face

Brayden's End of the Year Program

He went to Jareds.....Mother's Day Rings from each kid. Birthstone, Diamond, and it has birthdays and names engraved on them for each child, respectively.

Laugh, Baby, Laugh... I love your hearty belly laugh...

At my Brother Christopher's Wedding in June

Daddy and Grayson at the Birthday Party

Mommy and Grayson at the birthday party

Grayson's Sweetness

The hot tub

Grayson LOVES pizza. He ate 4 slices, and bread, and salad.

The duck cake (above) and the #1 cake (below) that he got ALL to himself

Oops, I forgot to put his shirt on him before he started eating cake. I bought it specifically for eating cake, and he was going to wear it!!!

Just wait, it gets worse...

Aaahhh, Now that was some GOOOOOOOOD cake!

I met Jodie on babycenter chat room when I was pregnant with Brayden. We've been "friends" ever since, and still talk often, but had never made the drive to see each other. I was so excited to have her come to the party and we finally got to "meet" face to face, even though we already knew each other very, very well.

All cleaned up and ready for bed. Just need to wash the cake down.

Showin' off his skills...

Ready to open presents.

If the present is bigger than you, do it Grayson's way and climb on top!!

Look at my new toys...

Grayson ridin' his new Bounce N Spin Zebra


Kaylee's Dance Recital and her friends from dance class.

Words from a boy

This morning as I was fixing my hair, I had my usual audience of Brayden and Grayson in the bathroom with me. As Grayson was tugging on my pant leg fussing for me to pick him up, I reached into the drawer to get out my molding mud. The following conversation took place as Brayden looked at me bewildered:

Brayden: "What's that grey stuff, Mom?"
Me: "It's for girl's hair" as I am putting it in and fluffing it around
Brayden: " Oh, it gives you a hump in your hair?"
Me (laughing): "Yes, it gives me a hump in my hair"
(as I finish and my hair looks VERY frightening and looks like I just rolled out of bed and hadn't brushed my hair in days)
Brayden: "OOOHHH, Mom you look SCAAARY!"

So, I did what any mom would do if her son told her she looked scary....

I looked directly at him.....

I raised my hands in the air.....


And I GROWLED like a monster!!!!

then I fixed my "hump" to look like a decent hip hairstyle...

Brayden-isms

1. Brayden got caught poking his cousin in the head. He said he didn't do it. "Jesus did it" he kept repeating. He just continued to poke him in the forehead and was saying "Jesus did it". About 2 days later, it dawned on me that we had been reading the story of Cain and Abel. When Cain killed Abel, God came down and asked Cain where his brother was. Cain said "I am not my brothers keeper". But, God knew what he had done. God cast him out of the land and put a red mark on his forehead so that all people would know he was a murderer. I asked Brayden if he poked his cousin in the head because of something he saw or read and he said "yes, Daddy read me that story." Smart kid....

2. At preschool, the teachers pray in the mornings before school starts, so we are not allowed to drop off early or it will interrupt prayer time. Brayden kept wondering why we couldn't go in. I explained it to him and 2 minutes later, he asked "mom, can we go inside now? They are done pairing"

3. Brayden loves Chee-balls. Those are the cheetos puffs.

4. I asked Brayden what he wanted for Breakfast. He said he wanted the cereal with marshmallows (Lucky Charms). I told him we didn't have any. He sighed a HUGE sigh and said "Ok....fine.....I'll just have some chips"

5. We are at Kaylee's school program. He is sitting on the cafeteria table and I am sitting next to him, but on the bench. I am totally engrossed in my daughter singing and not really paying attention to what he was doing. I knew he was next to me, I just wasn't looking directly at him. He says to me "Mom, look at my butt" and I glance over and I discover that he had pulled down his pants and his butt was hanging out the back....and there were about 20 people standing behind us! He mooned everyone and I have no idea how long he had been like that!!!!!

Interesting Artwork

We were helping Kaylee clean her room tonight. We came across a wonderful, magnificent piece of artwork. We just weren't quite sure what she was drawing. So, Chris shows me this piece of work. I am in her closet trying to hide my laughter. He is laughing out loud and asked her what exactly it was a picture of.





She responded, so matter-of-factly, as if she were saying "Dad, don't you know what that is? DUH!" So positive that we would know what it was....without question.....

"It's a thumbs up" she said.... complete with an eye roll as if she was so offended that we couldn't figure it out on our own....



What were you thinking???? Get your mind out of the gutter!!!!

I'm still laughing.......